Monday, October 04, 2010

I Will Not Talk Him Off The Ledge

Why is it I think of reasonably good things to blog about while I am driving? Then I get home and it's all vanished from my brain. Ah...middle age.

Iain is traveling so I had to take Duncan to school this morning. I was kind of looking forward to it, because I have not done it since the first week of school. I got the babies changed and dressed, got Duncan dressed, got a decent lunch for him made, his backpack ready, and a cup of coffee in my system and we were out the door a few minutes before 8:00. I looked back at him while we were driving and saw tears welling up in his eyes and a very crest-fallen look on his face. Heavy sigh. I pulled up in front of the school where Thee Shall Not Park and told him he'd have to walk inside by himself. As he walked away, with his Spiderman back pack and his red Converse tennis shoes he looked So.Very.Small to me. I held it together but barely, and suddenly longed for the days of him driving me nuts, play dates, blanket forts and seeing him in his underwear all day long, refusing to put shorts on. Perhaps this is normal and what all moms feel, while watching their very small five year old boys put on a brave face for mom and trudge into kindergarten...but perhaps not.

So, I took Claire and Finn to the Y, put them in child care and worked out. I am doing the Couch to 5K training program and no one is more surprised than me that I am enjoying it. I do need some good music though because right now all I have on my ipod is Eye of the Tiger. I am not a music person.

After the Y, we came home and had some lunch (and when I say "we" I mean Claire and I...Finn had a few Cheerios this morning and I'm sure was absolutely stuffed) and I put them down for a nap. I cleaned house while they slept and think I have finally caught up from the few days a few weeks ago when Claire and I both got the pukes. Suddenly, it was time to go pick up Duncan and I was really ready and anxious to see him. Pick up has gotten alot better from a logistical stand point. I pull up on a side street, right outside the door where his class gets out. It is now only his class that comes out of this door, and if I get there early enough can just pop out of the car and meet him at the door, never having to step more than twenty or thirty feet. When I got him today, he was very disappointed. Because now, all the kids from his class come out the door and sit on a little ledge just outside the door and wait for their moms and dads. I suppose this is the equivalent of...well....I'm not sure but I guess it's the thing to do and he wanted to do it but I got there too soon so he didn't get to sit on the ledge and wait for me. I promised him that tomorrow I will let him sit on the ledge. Even if I am sitting twenty feet away staring at him from the van.

We drove straight out to my sister's and mom's to say good bye to my brother and his wife who were here visiting from Montana. Duncan is really fond of both of them so it was important to me and to him that we go say goodbye. They left for the airport shortly after we got there but it was worth the trip out and back home again. We came home, got the babies to bed, and Duncan and I sat down at the table to get his homework done. He had to trace his name four times and write it ten times. And that took at least. Forty five. Minutes. Finally got them all in bed and asleep and am now watching The Event and burning my new Nefertiti candle (b-day gift from my sis) and am about to have a Tom Collins.

And tomorrow, my son shall sit on the ledge with what I can only assume are the cool kids.


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